


The World Around Us

by TheBeautifulLove



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Borussia Dortmund, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-28
Updated: 2013-12-19
Packaged: 2017-12-27 21:21:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/983760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBeautifulLove/pseuds/TheBeautifulLove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The story of Marco and Robert and their unspoken feelings for each other.</p><p>(Discontinued, sorry)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. How It Began

Marco finds himself staring at his team mate. Again. It keeps happening without a warning, just out of the blue and pretty much everywhere. Deep inside he knows what it means but he doesn't want to and he can't accept the truth. So, he sits alone, in silence trying to ignore the weird feelings that keep him awake at night and distracted at day. His heart beats faster again and he feels strangely nervous, just by looking at him. He never felt this way before and it terrifies him a little. All this time he tried to convince himself that they were just feelings; just silly little emotions, hidden somewhere at the very bottom of his heart. He turns his eyes away to look at his hands. It is dangerous, he knows, to follow the directions of his heart. Those directions always lead him to places he never wants to go to. 

But this is different, it is new, it is intoxicating. It feels inevitable and yet he tries to avoid it for as long as it's possible. But how long can you keep inflicting pain to yourself? Marco is aware that his feelings are wrong and he needs to stop them. However this time he knows he lost the fight before it even began...  
He looks up again and instantly regrets this as his eyes land onto the whole cause of his confusion. There in the sharp spring sun stands his teammate Robert and there are the emotions again, struggling and begging to be released. Marco suddenly can't move, even if he tries and the only thing he does is stare blankly because the sun never shines this bright at this time of year and the grass never quite looks so green and yet it's merely a background to true beauty that stands there. His dark brown hair is so perfect and his eyes are hypnotizing and his lips are pink. And Marco was never really good at describing things with words but in this moment he feels he can write a poem about his friend.

Somehow the word 'friend' doesn't sound right anymore. Perhaps it never did but there were too many confusions and he never stopped to think about it. He is scared. Marco doesn't want to get hurt, especially not again, so soon after he lost something very dear to him - a best friend. He doesn't blame Mario for leaving but that didn't stop the tears from rolling down his cheeks that night. 

Robert finally meets Marco's gaze and there is that smile again. It is rare - sometimes the blonde likes to think it is saved only for him and this thought makes him feel like he could fly. He gives his best smile and drops his eyes to the ground. The red on his pale cheeks is not something he wants to show, especially not to Robert. But then someone sits next to him and he hears a familiar voice:

'Hey, what's up?' 

It's Kevin. Marco looks up at him and tries to smile. 'Nothing special.' 

'I was thinking of throwing a party this weekend, you'll come right?' he asks.

'Maybe.' 

'What do you mean by 'maybe'? You know my parties are the best.' Kevin sounds hurt.

Marco takes a deep breath and replies calmly. 'Okay, I'll be there.' 

'Great.' Kevin gets up and leaves the training grounds leaving Marco alone to watch the sunset. It was a hard day but the sky looks as beautiful as always with its pinks and purples turning darker with every passing minute. It promises a better tomorrow. With this in mind the young Dortmund player gets up from the bench and starts slowly walking towards the locker room.


	2. The Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party at Kevin's and a lot of awkward times.

"The day of Kevin's party is today." Marco realizes as he gets up from bed on a Saturday morning. The apartment is quiet and curtains are drawn so that the sun can't peak into the huge bedroom. He walks towards the bathroom and takes a look in the mirror only to realize that he looks even worse than he feels. Because the truth is he is not in the best mood lately and if he could he would spend this day in bed rather than going over to Kevin's. But still he takes the shower, dresses up, does his hair and steps into the kitchen to get some breakfast. 

Later when Marco is watching some TV in the living room, his phone rings. He gets up to answer it and looks at the screen to see that it's Kevin.

'Hello?' 

'Hi Marco! Just making sure that you are coming tonight, right bro?' Kevin asks.

'Yeah, I'm coming. What time it starts?'

'Actually some of us are already here, just hanging out and having a beer. Come anytime you want.'

'Okay. I'll probably be there around eight. See you then.' Marco is about to hang up when he hears Kevin say:

'Oh, I forgot, there will be these hot girls coming tonight and I know two of them are single, so...' Kevin doesn't finish the sentence but he doesn't need to. It's not the first time he's trying to be a good friend by setting Marco up with some girls. That's why he didn't want to come in the first place. 

'I told you that I'm fine. I don't need you to find me a girlfriend!' Marco is getting annoyed at this point. 

'I know but at least meet those girls, you never know what will happen.' There is a long silence.

'Okay. Whatever.' says the blonde finally and hangs up.

Kevin is a good friend apart from the times when he does that kind of things because Marco doesn't want a girlfriend and he just can't seem to understand this. He's confused enough about his love life and now there will be those girls again. They are all the same: pushy and pretending to like football just to go to bed with you. Suddenly the party invitation feels like a ticket to hell. 

At eight o'clock Marco walks towards his car and gets inside. He closes the door but instead of driving he sits there with his arms on the steering wheel and his head on his arms, breathing deeply. He feels like going back to the house for a second but he thinks of how mad Kevin would get. Then he thinks that Robert will probably be there and he gets really sad because he will have to talk to him and look at him and smile and pretend that everything is okay and that he doesn't see him in his dreams every night...

About 30 minutes later Marco arrives at Kevin's house. Before he even gets out of his car he hears loud music and sees people everywhere. Straight away he knows it's going to be a disaster because he doesn't like that kind of loud parties with lots of drinking and half-naked people. He would rather stay at home in peace and quiet and have a beer and watch a film. He gets out of the car and walks towards the door that are open wide anyway and someone nearly knocks him over but they don't even care because they are clearly drunk. 

Then out of the crowd he sees a familiar face: Marcel. He walks to him to say hello. Marcel is having so much fun dancing with a group of girls that he doesn't see him at first. But when he does he is so drunk he smiles so wide and embraces Marco almost spinning him around like a girl. 

'Marco! You're here! This party is so fun you know!' Marcel screams over the music. 

'Yeah it seems like it. How long are you here?' Marco asks.

'Only few hours but some people came early and they had so much to drink that they already passed out in the guest rooms.' 

'That's cool. Hey, do you know where Kevin is?' Marco asks because he feels like he needs to let Kevin know that he's here otherwise he will be upset. 

'Check in the kitchen. I saw him mixing some drinks a while earlier. By the way you need to try this blue one he made for me, it was the best drink of my freaking life!' Marcel shouts and Marco has a feeling that his friend will soon be another one of those passed out people.

Marco finds his way to the kitchen through the ocean of people. Kevin is still there mixing drinks, so Marco takes one of the blue ones that Marcel talked about and he needs to admit it is pretty good. 

'Marco! I'm glad you made it.' Kevin smiles at him. 

'Yeah, I thought it would be fun and I wasn't wrong, it's a great party.' Marco lies. 

'Cool. Get some more drinks and I'll take you to meet the girls as promised.' 

Kevin pats him on the back and doesn't notice the gloom expression on the blonde's face. He should have known he would remember and won't let it go. He doesn't have the strength to argue. So they head towards the living room, where he already notices two girls looking their way. Kevin must have told them already that he will introduce them to Marco. "This is going to be a disaster." Marco thinks as he and Kevin approach them. 

'Girls meet Marco Reus.' Kevin says to them and they smile so wide and look at him with admiration. 

'Hi, I'm Jenna.' says one of them and gives a little wave with her hand. Marco notices her voice is really high pitched and it's kind of painful for his ears. Jenna is a blonde with her hair cut pretty short. Her eyes are brown and heavily made up with eyeliner. She wears a very short and very fitting blue dress. Marco nods in her direction trying his best at smiling.

'And I'm Sandra.' says the other one. 

'Hi.' Marco says and looks at her. She seems much prettier than Jenna but still very girly and well... not Marco's type. But she could definitely be considered by someone as hot with her dark long hair, slightly wavy and her piercing blue eyes and big lips, bright red lipstick covering them precisely. 

'Great! I'll leave you guys to get to know each other better. I need to get more drinks from the storage room.' Kevin makes an excuse and leaves. Marco thinks that now it will get awkward as he's not into them but it's not actually because Jenna immediately starts talking:

'So you're playing football. That must be so fascinating, I always wanted to know a professional footballer, you know? I totally love your team. I mean I'm a big fan since I remember, you know? And the kits are like the best, I mean who doesn't like a bit of black and yellow now and then, right?' she ends her speech with a giggle. 

'Right...' Marco says looking around hoping to get out of this situation somehow.

'Oh let's not talk about football, I'm sure Marco came here to have some fun, not to give an interview.' Says Sandra and Marco is actually a bit relieved at this. But then she asks:

'So, do you have a girlfriend?' 

'Not right now, no.' says the blonde boy and looks uncomfortable. 

'I can't believe that. You're so handsome and talented.' Jenna comments getting closer and is about to put her hand on his chest when someone approaches them in a rushed manner. 

Marco immediately recognizes Robert and his heart skips a beat. But then Robert looks really alarmed and says really fast:

'Marco! I was just outside and I think I saw someone trying to break into your car!' Marco is so happy to see him that he barely hears what Robert is saying. But then he registers and runs outside following his friend to see what exactly is going on with his car. When they reach the car, it seems like everything is in its place. 

'Robert, I think you looked at the wrong-' and suddenly he looks up at Robert who is smiling at him and he understands. And they both laugh at the situation. 

'I made up the story to get you out of there.'

'I didn't need help. I was about to say the most believable excuse and go home.' Marco says.

'Really?' Robert looks at him, not convinced. Marco laughs.

'Okay, thank you for getting me out of the hell back there.' the blonde says and gets closer because it's still pretty loud out here and he barely hears what the brunette says. 

'Anytime.' Robert says and the look at each other until it becomes weird and they get instantly more serious. 

'So you're going home now?' Marco asks. 

'No, I promised Marcel to drive him home. I should probably go look for him.' Robert says. 

'I guess I will see you on Monday during training, right?' Marco asks hoping there is no reason that it will not happen. 

'Yes, of course.' Robert smiles and embraces Marco in a sudden goodbye hug. 

Marco leans into the feel and breathes deeply. He wishes they could stay like this forever. But they break apart and Robert walks away saying his goodbyes and Marco smiles and waves. After his friend is long gone he still stands there looking at the door and thinks to himself: "Why do I have to feel this way? He will never return my feelings." 

Finally he gets into his car and drives as quickly as possible home and just buries his face in his pillow and sleeps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter!  
>  Hope you enjoyed this. It came out longer than part 1 for some reason but I didn't want to cut it. This would be pointless.   
> (I will post another Marco Reus one shot tomorrow so keep an eye out for it! It will be Gotzeus this time :)  
> The next chapter of this story should be posted in about three days. 
> 
> Thank you everyone! xxxx


	3. The Training Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marco hears something he didn't expect and Robert is adorable .

Marco thinks of how nice the sun shines and how warm it is even though it's November as he drives to training on Monday. He puts the volume of the music higher up and sings along. He is wearing his grey sweater that lately has become his favourite and it has nothing to do with the fact that Robert said that it looks good on him. He smiles and checks his hair in the side mirror again. 

Ten minutes later Marco gets out of his car at the training grounds parking lot and goes straight towards the changing room. The other guys are already there chatting among themselves. He hears the topic of conversation and rolls his eyes. 

'Hi guys.' he says as he puts his bag on the bench next to his locker. There is Henrikh next to him to his left and next to Henrikh, Robert. He looks at him as he unbuttons his shirt and Marco quickly looks away feeling a blush creeping onto his cheeks. 

'C'mon then. Ask Marco. He was there!' Kevin shouts at the whole room, but his words are actually directed at Sebastian who looks like he is not convinced about anything. 

'Ask Marco what?' Marco looks at Kevin who is by his side the second he asks. 

'About my party last Saturday! Wasn't it epic?' Kevin smiles wide at the blonde and expects an answer. Marco tries to look like he is not about to tell a lie and says:

'Of course, it was great.' 

'Okay, I believe Marco.' says the captain and puts on his BVB t-shirt, smiling.

'Oh, by the way, how did you find the girls? They were hot, right?' Kevin asks Marco and everyone looks at him expecting Marco's response. The noise goes down and it's suddenly pretty quiet in the room except some sounds and conversations at the other side of the room where Kuba and Lukasz are watching a Youtube video and don't care for what is going on a few steps away from them. 

'Yeah, they were hot... Just not my type.' Marco says looking awfully uncomfortable. 

Kevin is about to say something else, when he is suddenly interrupted by Marco:

'I left my boots at the car. I need to go and get them.' and with that he goes out the door quickly, leaving all the faces blank and awkwardly looking at each other.

Marco feels really stupid for running away and not acting it cool but he just can't stand this constant pressure on girlfriends. He knows that soon the boys will notice he acts weird and confront him about it. He doesn't know if any of them know that he's gay or hopelessly crashing on Robert but he hopes that they don't. It's hard enough the way it is and he isn't ready to accept it yet himself. 

He takes an extra pair of boots from his car even though there are his favourite ones in his bag in the locker room. He takes a deep breath of fresh autumn air and heads back inside to finally change and start training. He is about to open the door when he hears a voice he knows very well speaking while the rest of the boys are silent. He doesn't want to be eavesdropping but what he hears makes him stop and listen:

'...and I don't understand what is going on myself but I'm not that blind.' Robert says in a strong voice. Marco smiles and melts inside just hearing it but he also knows he is talking about him so he continues to listen:

'Are you all really that blind? He clearly doesn't want to talk about girlfriends, so why you keep bothering him about it? If he wanted a girlfriend he would find one for himself. He is handsome, funny, talented and every girl would want him. Remember how much he changed after his last break up? Something is different about him since then I think we should ask if he needs help and stop bringing up the topic that clearly hurts him and makes him uncomfortable.' Robert finishes his speech and all is silent. 

At this moment Marco's heart beats fast, there is a shy smile on his lips and his eyes water with tears. He thinks it's really sweet for Robert to notice that there is something wrong with him and to tell the others. It makes him even more certain that he feels more than friendship towards the brunette boy. 

'You're right. That was stupid of me. I just thought that if he gets a new girlfriend he will be the way he used to be. And he would stop being so... distant.' Kevin speaks in a low voice. 

'We're all a bit worried about him but I think he needs time.' Sebastian says in a serious voice. There is a murmur of agreement among everyone. 

Marco chooses to enter now. He tries to act normal and pretends he didn't hear anything. Just as they all see him they go back to their tasks and finish off changing. It is pretty silent until they are all ready and walk out onto the green pitch, where Klopp and his assistants are already waiting for them, discussing something between each other. 

They run a little before they do stretches and then they play against each other in teams. It is quite different than usual because Marco can't stop thinking about what he heard earlier and it's distracting him. Luckily he decides to stop and concentrates on his game. With a clever pass from him to Nuri, they manage to score against Robert's team. 

'C'mon guys! What kind of defense is this?' Robert jokes with his team members, faking anger. 

'You're losing Lewandowski. Deal with it.' Marco laughs as he passes the Pole. 

'That was a lucky goal.' Robert shouts after the blonde, smiling. 

The training ends with Marco's team winning 5: 4. Klopp congratulates them and dismisses them to the locker room. The boys shower, change and slowly start going in their own ways. Marco watches Robert as the brunette texts with someone on his phone. He seems like he is upset by something suddenly.

'Something happened?' Marco asks.

'I was supposed to see a friend now but he canceled and it looks like I will be spending the evening at home alone after all.' he looks at Marco and pouts making a sad face. It looks so adorable that Marco melts inside for the second time today. Is it possible for someone to be so cute?

'I'm free today as well. If you want we could hang out.' Marco proposes feeling a bit awkward. He doesn't want to come across like he is desperate to be with him. Not even when it's totally true. 

'Yeah, sure. That would be great.' Robert says and smiles. 

'Okay then. Let's go.' Marco is jumping inside but keeps it cool. They take their stuff and head out discussing where they should go on the way to the parking lot. "Don't screw this up" Marco thinks to himself as they walk so close to each other that their arms touch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking absolutely ages with this but I have so much work at college... 
> 
> Thank you for reading and next time will be more action because... a date is happening! Well not a real date but they spent time together so... ;)
> 
> Love xxx


	4. Boys Night Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fun times, laughter and sweet surprises.

They get into Robert's car because the brunette insists, so Marco leaves his own at the parking lot. Marco likes his friend's car a lot and if he could he would buy the same one for himself but that would seem weird if he did that. He also doesn't want to admit it but he totally loves watching him drive. His arms look so strong and slightly darker than his own skin and he loves it. He doesn't want to be staring but it may be too late. Oh, well. Marco doesn't care because they are driving towards the bowling saloon and he really wants to prove he is good at it even though he knows he is not. He will try hard this time because he wants to impress Robert of course. 

'You sure you want to go bowling?' Robert asks Marco while he drives his car. 

'Sure, why?' Marco asks looking at him, confused.

'Well, I saw the video of you trying to do it. It wasn't a very good attempt and I'm pretty good at bowling.' Robert says and you can hear pride in his voice. Marco laughs.

'You saw it? Okay, I know I'm not the best at it but I'm going to try my hardest.' he says with determined face. 

'Don't worry, I was just teasing you.' Robert smiles as he pulls his car into a stop in front of the saloon. 

Thirty minutes later there is a lot of laughter in the room. They are having a lot of fun, even though Marco is still no better than in the video they talked about but it's quite funny to both of them. Robert is wining by a long way but Marco doesn't care that he is losing because he is enjoying spending time with the Pole a lot. 

'You were right when you said that you're good at bowling.' Marco says smiling. 

'Yeah, I used to always go with my friend who was actually competing for the champion of the country. He taught me a lot.' he says as he makes his move and then they both watch the ball roll in a perfect straight line and eight out of the ten pins fall to the ground with a familiar sound. 

'Well, either way I'm impressed. But in my defense you had someone teach you and I didn't.' Marco says. 

'Yeah, that's true.' Robert agrees and looks at Marco, concentrating for a moment and then he says: 'Do you want me to teach you?'

There is something in the way the brunette asks this but Marco can't quite put his finger on it. He is surprised for a moment but then he thinks that it could be nice to be at least a little better at this.

'Sure, I guess.' He says, accepts the ball from Robert and stands in front of the line, waiting for instructions of some sort.

Robert stands next to him with his own ball in his hand and shows him the movement that he should be making in order to give it the best chance of success. Marco tries to replicate it but it seems he gets it wrong. Marco sees Robert put his ball away and stand much closer to him this time.

'More like this.' the brunette says, very close to the younger boy's ear. Marco suddenly feels very hot as he feels his friend's chest touching his back. Marco feels Robert's hand on his own showing him the exact movement. Marco is breathing hard, feeling the warm hand on his and has trouble even concentrating on anything around him. He notices how amazing their hands look together, one a little paler than the other and they fit perfectly on top of the green ball. 

But then Robert moves away, way too soon, gives him space and says:

'Give it a try and remember to do like I showed you.' 

'Okay.' Marco says trying to focus on the task and trying to ignore his heart, which beats fast. 

He does his best and watches the ball as it rolls down the line. With a shock, he sees the ball hit the pins on the left side of them and four of them are knocked down. Marco smiles and looks at Robert, who is already coming towards him and giving the blonde boy a hug. Marco closes his eyes and hugs him back, enjoying the strong, yet very comforting embrace of his friend. 

'See? That was much better!' Robert compliments him with an excited voice. 

'Thanks. It seems you're a great teacher.' Marco laughs when they break away from each other's arms. There is a moment of silence. The room is almost empty as most of the people already left. 

'I think it's enough for today. How about we go for a drink now?' Robert asks.

'Yeah, of course.' Marco agrees. 'But we will be back because there is still a lot you need to teach me.' he rushes to make sure because if Robert teaching him bowling means touching and hugs he is more than up for it. 

'Yes, you definitely need more lessons from me.' Robert says as they leave the establishment and it may be just Marco's mind but is Robert flirting with him? "It's probably just my imagination." Marco thinks to himself but he still smiles and nods. 

It is the most fun he had in weeks and he is happy. Just happy and not thinking about Mario and not worrying about his career and not dealing with the 'girlfriend issues'. And it feels amazing and pure.

 

Two hours later they are found in a pub with drinks in their hands. It's really loud at the place and people are enjoying themselves as well as are Marco and Robert. They are drinking their beers right now and it's great. It seems like this pub is never showing football on TV because nobody recognizes them and it feels nice to not be asked for autographs and pictures for once. That was probably one of the reasons why they decided to have more than one drink tonight. 

'Man, this is great. I'm so glad we went out tonight.' Robert says siting opposite Marco at their table and finishing his second beer. He knows he is a bit tipsy now but he doesn't care. 

'I know. I didn't have this much fun in... I think years.' Marco agrees and he is a bit more drunk than Robert but he won't be driving so he lets himself this. 

'Years?' the brunette laughs. 'I don't believe that.'

'I swear it's true, like, I don't go out that much because of the media always taking photos and stuff but this is great.' 

'We should hang out more often then.' Robert says.

'Um, definitely!' Marco agrees and drinks his beer. 

'But now it's getting pretty late, so we should be going back I think.' Robert reasons with a sad sigh.

'I know... We will still come back here though.' Marco says with a smile trying not be staring into his friend's eyes, which glow so beautifully in the dim light. 

As they leave the pub few minutes later, Marco turns around to the people who are still having a great time and shouts:

'I love you people! Thank you for the great evening!' and they leave, while the people cheer and clap at them. 

'You're crazy, you know that?' the older one asks the blonde. 

'Crazy good or crazy bad?' Marco asks with a wink because he is slightly drunk and he doesn't care what he is doing. Robert laughs at him.

'Definitely crazy good!' he replies and puts his arm around Marco's shoulders.

Marco feels awesome walking like this. Close to the person that changed his world from the first day he saw him and feeling his touch. His heart beats fast and he suddenly remembers everything they ever did together. Every laugh, every hug, every match. 

They reach the car and Robert is about to pull out his key from his pocket when Marco thinks to himself "I can't take this anymore." and he turns to face his friend putting his arms around him and looks him in the eyes just before he leans in and places his lips on Robert's. 

Marco kisses him slowly barely moving his lips at all. He is so scared and he suddenly realizes exactly what he's doing and breaks away. He is about to apologize when Robert pulls him in closer. The older one puts his arms around the blonde's neck, looks him in the eyes and brings their lips back together. This makes Marco's heart beat even faster and he smiles into the kiss feeling soft and sweet lips touch with his own. To say that it is the best kiss he ever received would be an understatement. It is everything he ever could wish for and much more. It is a good thing that Robert has his strong arms around him otherwise he was sure that he would faint. 

After what seems like forever and and way too soon at the same time, they break apart from each other. The night is dark around them that they barely see each other and they don't care if anyone is watching or not. Everything is perfect. 

'I didn't expect this evening to lead to this, to be honest.' the brunette whispers with a shaky laugh. 

'Me neither, but I'm not going to lie that I didn't like it.' Marco says softly and honestly. 

'I never felt this amazing kissing anyone.' Marco smiles hearing this and says:

'You better drive me home before I start speaking like a love struck teenage girl.'

They get into the car and talk while they drive. Marco is happy that above everything else that may be between them there is a strong friendship. He knows that this is different than everything he ever experienced but he wouldn't swap it for anything else. That he is completely sure of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again sorry for the wait. I should upload quicker from now on because I will have more free time.
> 
> Anyway as always I hope you liked it! Thanks for all the love, I appreciate it a lot!
> 
> Love xxx


	5. At The Cafe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love is complicated and Marco can't believe what happened.

Today is a free day from any training or other football related things. It's nice because Marco can finally get some sleep in the morning. He didn't set an alarm the night before and when he wakes up, he has a feeling that it's late. He gets up very slowly and checks the time on his phone. It reads 14:32, so he was right. It really is late. 

Marco smiles however noticing that there is a message from Robert on his phone. He stares at it for a long time before opening. It says: "Hey Marco. I was hoping that you're not busy today, I want to meet up. Let me know if you're free." 

The blonde bites his lip to keep from smiling so wide like an idiot. He wants to see him so bad and he's so happy right now. He replies straight away because the message was received about two hours ago. He types quickly: "Hiya! :) Yeah I'm free. Meet me at Rose Cafe in an hour. x" 

Few minutes later he receives a reply to his text: "Okay. I will see you there." Marco puts his phone on the coffee table and goes to the bathroom to take a shower, looking forward to see the brunette again. Yesterday after everything that happened, he couldn't sleep for hours. The images slightly blurry but blissful and fresh in his mind. There were not many such amazing moments in his life and since that time he finally knows that his feelings are returned. He still can't believe it's real and he didn't imagine all of this. 

He comes out of the bathroom twenty minutes later, looking and feeling better and grabs an apple from the kitchen on the way to the door. He remembers that his car is still at the parking lot and he has no choice but walk. Luckily, it's not very far and it may actually be good for his health. He takes a bite of the pink apple as he starts walking towards the cafe. 

Walking on the busy streets of Dortmund, Marco sees the city and its beauty - the people, the buildings and just something that feels like home. He takes a deep breath of the cold air and zips his jumper further up to keep the warmth. 

Finally he reaches the cafe and walks inside feeling much better and much warmer. The air smells like coffee and freshly baked cake. He looks around and sure enough Robert is already there, sitting in the corner. The younger boy stands there, looking at him, while the other doesn't see him yet. He smiles noticing how the brunette looks at his phone nervously. A young boy then approaches him and Robert gives him an autograph and they take a picture together. The boy is really happy and says something with excitement. The Pole smiles at whatever he is saying and they share a hug before the boy goes back to his mother who waits impatiently few steps away. Seeing this makes Marco feel warm inside. 

The German finally walks to the table and takes a sit opposite Robert. His friend is wearing a red hoodie today and the colour really suits him. His expression is tired though. It seems like he didn't get much sleep last night either.

'Hi, are you waiting long?' Marco asks with concern.

'Hi. No, I just got here.' Robert replies with a calm voice. 

It seems like they are two opposites today. Marco is happy and energetic whereas the brunette is serious and not like his usual self. The younger one has a feeling that something may be wrong but he hopes that it is not true. He asks:

'Is everything okay? You seem different.'  
Suddenly Robert looks very nervous and he takes a deep breath. Marco closes his eyes for a moment, the bad feeling becoming stronger. Finally, he starts quietly saying:

'Look, Marco... We need to talk about something and I just don't know how to start this.' 

There is silence and it's Marco's turn to be nervous. He chooses not to even think what it could be about. He looks into Robert's eyes to find some sort of answer but they seem to be empty, nevertheless beautiful as always...

'What is it?' Marco asks with a weak voice.

Robert looks down at his hands. There is the silence again and they both know that something bad is going to happen. The brunette says slowly:

'It's about what happened yesterday between us.' Marco's heart stops and he is expecting the worst. Robert continues:

'I think we made a mistake. We were both a bit drunk and it shouldn't have happened.'

This words are almost like a curse as it has such strong effect on the blonde. Marco can't believe what he hears. He doesn't want to believe it's true. There is emptiness in his mind and he tries really hard to keep the tears from escaping his eyes. He waits for more words, more pain. 

'I'm really sorry but I'm not gay, Marco. And you're great but I realised that it was wrong and it shouldn't have happened.'

Marco pretends to be alright but deep inside it feels as if he's falling down into a dark hole with no escape. He barely looks at the older boy because he was never good at hiding his feelings. He tries to hold himself together but he's shaking slightly and nothing is okay. Despite that, he manages to say:

'You're probably right. Let's forget that it ever happened, okay?' 

None of it is honest but he knows this is the last thing he can do to protect himself. This time he knows he needs to lie, otherwise he will break inside for good. He needs to try to be strong. The blonde gets up quickly before Robert can say or do anything. 

'I need to go. I'll see you later.' Marco says and walks away before the tears rebel and escape his eyes.

At the door, he stops for a moment and turns around to take one more look at the boy but everything is blurry. He walks out of the cafe into the cold and shivers from both cold and the strong emotions. He can't take this anymore. He runs back home. All the time he hears in his head one word: mistake. mistake, mistake...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so much time. I was at a hospital... but it's okay now.
> 
> As always, hope you enjoyed it! (Sorry for the sad part)
> 
> Love xxx


	6. Intruders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 'I want to apologize.'

'Hello?' Marco hears his boss answer the call. 

'Hi, coach. I wanted to ask if it's okay if I don't play today.' the blonde goes straight to the point of why he called Klopp so early in the morning. 

'Is something wrong?'

'Yes. Umm... I think I caught the cold.' Marco changes his voice to sound ill. There is a short pause.

'Well, that's too bad but I understand. Stay at home and get plenty of rest. Do you need me to send someone? Do you need anything?' Klopp changes to his 'worried-papa' mode.

'No, thank you, coach. I'll just stay in bed and sleep it off.' Marco tries to sound tired and fakes a cough. 

'Okay, Marco. I hope you'll feel better soon. Call me if you need anything.'

'Sure. Good luck today.' 

'Don't worry. We'll smash them.' Klopp replies with enthusiasm. 

Marco ends the call with a little smile, grateful to have such an amazing coach. He feels a bit guilty for lying about his illness but today they play a match against Freiburg and he is not in a mood for that at all. He doesn't want to face Robert. It's been only a day since the events at the cafe but he spent all the time at his apartment, mostly sleeping, unable to just shake it off and move on. How do you even do that when you just lost the only person you ever really cared about? 

There are a few missed calls on his phone from Robert, Kevin and his mum but he can't deal with anything right now. So, he throws his phone onto the sofa and goes back to his bedroom and collapses on top of it and tries to fall asleep as soon as possible to avoid thinking about a certain brown-haired, blue-eyed boy.

***

There are strange sounds reaching Marco's ears as he lies on his bed half-asleep, half-woken up by the noise. Suddenly, someone is walking through his living room and towards his bedroom. Normally, he would get up to see who the hell is there but today he has no strength to even move, so he decides to go back to sleep. However, this proves difficult as he hears the person enter his bedroom and knock on the door, even though it is wide open.

'If you're a thief, there are money in my desk drawer.' Marco says in a tired, weak voice.

'Do you really think a thief would knock on the door?' Marco recognizes Kevin's voice, slightly amused.

Kevin crosses the length of the room and sits on the side of the bed, where he can only see the side of Marco's head.

'Klopp said that you're ill, so I thought I would check on you.' 

'You should be at the training grounds right now. Besides, I don't need a babysitter.' 

'Oh, don't worry. I won't be spoon feeding you chicken soup or anything like that. I need to go back soon anyway, the match is in five hours.'

Marco gets up to a sitting position and faces his friend, yawning. There are dark bags under his eyes, his hair is a mess and it's clear that he didn't shave today or yesterday for that matter. Kevin takes a closer look and suddenly realizes what is actually going on.

'You're not really ill are you?' Kevin asks. 

'Of course, I am.' Marco argues faking a cough.

'C'mon. What is this really about?'

'Nothing. I'm just not in a mood or shape to play a match, okay? I'm tired, I need rest.' he replies angrily.

'Okay, then. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. Just please, answer my phone calls, so I know that you're alive.'

Kevin gets up and walks slowly towards the door. Suddenly, he stops and turns around to look at the blonde again. 

'Oh, and answer Robert's calls. He's worried about you too.' 

'As if.' Marco's tone is what surprises Kevin the most. He asks:

'So is this it? Did you two argue?' 

'Just go Kevin. You need to prepare for the match.'

'C'mon, Marco. Just stop this non-sense. You guys are best friends.'

Kevin doesn't get an answer to this as Marco lies back down on his bed and brings the covers up to his chin and closes his eyes. The older boy sighs and turns back to walk out of the room first and then out of the apartment, closing the door quietly behind him. When he is gone, Marco takes a deep breath and almost starts crying again. He just wants to be happy but it seems everything is against him. Something is always standing in the way and ruins everything. He should have known this time would be all the same but he couldn't help falling in love and now when Robert left him with nothing and broke his heart he should hate him so much but he just can't. Instead he keeps on going back to that evening when they kissed and the pain grows but he doesn't mind it anymore. It is the only thing he has left and he doesn't want to let go of the memories. He needs them to live, more than air, more than food, more than anything. 

He doesn't notice when he falls asleep again and when he wakes... Everything feels all the same. All he thinks about and dreams about is the brunette and he no longer can differentiate between dream and reality. It goes on for hours until he wakes later and the clock on his nightstand shows that it's 18:30. The match is about to start. He knows it's probably a bad idea to watch it but he gets up from the bed anyway and wraps a blanket around himself and walks slowly towards the living room and picks up the remote control to switch on the TV. 

***

Much later as the match ended and Dortmund won of course; Marco goes to the bathroom to take a bath and shave. Half an hour later he comes out feeling slightly better, wearing his favourite t-shirt and loose sweatpants. He thinks of something to do and considers going for a walk when there is a knock on the front door.

'Leave me alone, Kevin!' Marco shouts frustrated.

'It's not Kevin.' says the voice behind the doors and Marco's heart stops as he closes his eyes recognizing the voice all too well.

'Go to hell.' Marco answers. He forces himself to say this and it sounds weak because it's not really honest. He is just trying to stay strong. He knows he can't let himself get hurt again. 

'Please let me in, we need to talk.'

'We don't need to do anything.'

'Please, Marco. I shouldn't have said these things. I want to apologize.' 

Marco walks slowly towards the door and unlocks it with shaking hands. They can't argue on each side of the door no matter how much Marco wishes they could because he knows that if he sees his face it will be over for him - he will break to pieces. If it's possible to break even more.

He opens the door without looking up and immediately turns around to avoid looking at him for as long as possible. But how long can he look the other way when Robert calls his name in the soft voice of his? So, ever so slowly, he turns around and looks at the boy standing shyly by the door and the Pole looks just like the first time he came over to Reus' apartment. That unsure expression on his face and Marco wanders why did so much had to change from that day. 

'Marco... I'm sorry.' Robert says quietly, still standing next to the closed front door.

'For what?' Marco asks.

'For saying all the things at the cafe.' he replies. 'I know I hurt you. I know that I'm an idiot and I'm really sorry... I just got scared, I guess. I was scared of what it all meant because we're both guys and I never been in this situation before.'

Marco takes a sit on the edge of his couch and runs a hand through his hair. He bites his lips and clenches his jaw. He knows the words are honest and now it all makes a little more sense but he is still angry, sad and broken. He can't help feeling this way because it seems like everyone is leaving him - his girlfriend, Mario, Robert... but all he wants is to be happy. The older one continues:

'I only realized how much I need you in my life when I didn't see you for the past days and you never answered my calls and I was going mad... I totally understand if you never want to speak to me again, I would hate me too if I were you, actually.' 

Marco thinks about this for a minute and he already knows that he can't be too angry with him and he can't blame him for what happened but it still hurts. In the end it was just Marco's stupid hope that the other liked him too and he should know that Robert sees him only as a friend and the alcohol was what caused the kiss.

'At the cafe - you said the truth and that's all. I can't blame you for that and I don't hate you. Yes, you broke my heart but it was my own fault, I let myself believe that we could ever...That you actually had feelings for me...' Marco almost whispers, sadly.

Hearing this, Robert looks up and crosses the room to stand close to the blonde who still sits on the edge of the couch. Marco pretends that he doesn't notice it and keeps looking down.

'I didn't say that I don't have feelings for you.' 

'What?' Marco looks up into his eyes, surprised. For a second he gets lost in the bright blue. 

'This is the problem, Marco. I lied at the cafe because I was weak but the truth is that I realized that I like you and I want one more chance. Even if it means people rejecting me, I want to be with you. This time I'm not scared of what they will say.'

It takes a moment for the blonde boy and he doesn't know what to say. All he wants to do is throw himself into the older boy's arms and kiss him but he sits still because he knows it would be wrong. Robert was right that day at the cafe - it really is wrong. It should have never happened. Even if they like each other, what would people say? Their families, their friends, the media? It cannot end well and Marco has tears in his eyes again but he says:

'I'm sorry, Robert but I can't do it. I just can't. All I can promise you is that we will still be friends because I will probably die without you but I need time right now. I hope you understand.' 

There is silence between them and it suddenly looks dark all around and the atmosphere is heavy but there is nothing that can be done. Marco bites his lip so hard that it almost bleeds and he looks at Robert for his reaction. The brunette has his eyes closed and when he opens them again, he smiles a little bit but it's a very sad smile. It's hard-breaking really, just how sad it is. 

'Of course I understand. I know I screwed up and I can't expect more from you. But will you come to the training tomorrow?' Robert asks with hope in his voice.

Marco stands up and nods.

'I will see you then. Thanks for letting me in and I'm sorry.' 

Marco nods again unable to even speak right now. His friend looks so broken, like he probably did the past few days and it's true what they say - love hurts. It was supposed to make both of them happy but now they both suffer. 

Robert walks towards the door and leaves saying his goodbyes and Marco watches his pink lips and when the door closes, he misses him already. He takes a deep breath and rests his head against the hard wood. He remembers the first time they met when Marco transferred to Dortmund. 

*Flashback*

First thing he sees as he enters the training pitch is the players in two groups playing against each other. He knows some of them personally and some only from playing against them in the Bundesliga. Suddenly, someone scores a beautiful goal and Marco doesn't even realize as he says a quiet 'wow'. Klopp stands next to him and naturally hears what he said. The coach laughs lightly and says:

'So, you should probably meet him first, then.' 

Then the man calls out loud to the player:

'Robert!' 

The brunette runs up to them with a sweet smile on his face and says:

'What's up coach?'

Marco recognizes him of course but he hears his voice for the first time and he stares into these blue eyes and he can feel that they will get on well. Klopp gestures to Marco and introduces them to each other. 

'Welcome to the team, Marco.' Robert says confidently as he shakes the blonde's hand. 

Klopp pats Marco's shoulder and before he leaves, he says:

'Robert, please introduce Marco to the others and show him around. I need to sort some things out.'

'Sure.' says the Pole enthusiastically and for some reason it makes the younger boy blush. 

It seems Robert is both very talented and very kind. Marco definitely didn't expect such warm environment at the club and it feels oddly home-like even though it's his first day. He follows the brunette and feels so much calmer than before. "Does this boy has this effect on everyone or is it just him?" he thinks to himself...

*End of flashback*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for not uploading but I was involved in another project... But I will finish this fanfic, promise.
> 
> I hope you liked it!
> 
> Love xxx

**Author's Note:**

> There goes the first chapter. I hope you like it. 
> 
> Just to inform you:  
> *this is not a real representation of what is going on in BVB at this moment apart from the fact that Mario left. It will be explained later. This is set somewhere after Mario left but before it was announced that Robert is leaving.  
> *this is purely my imagination and my Reusdowski heart (still upset that Robert is leaving)  
> *more chapters coming soon!  
> *if you don't like this pairing for whatever reason, don't read and don't comment rude things. Thanks!
> 
> xxx


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